In my work as a psychoanalyst, I often think that none of us can avoid the fingerprints of our early history, the particulars of who our parent(s) and/or caretakers were and how their distinct elements shaped us, the specific interactions that molded our relational self. We cannot avoid it, nor would we want to. Our […]
Category: Relationships
ON TALKING –IN AND OUT OF CONTEXT.
Ever have the experience of hearing something you said but in a different context? Listening to your words yet feeling like something is not quite right? It may be that the actual words are not quite the same, or that they are said in a different tone of voice or affectation, or tweaked so that […]
ON SEISMIC ACTIVITY – And the Disruption of the Self.
In my work as a psychoanalyst I spend much of my time in areas of experience that tend to be de-stabilizing to our sense of personal integrity and unity. I am speaking here of those times when emotion overwhelms us, disrupting our sense of being oneself and ushering in feeling states that cause a disturbance […]
ON CHANGE: And What It Takes To Make It Happen.
It is the end of another year, and the beginning of a new one. After the holidays and celebrations, this is a time when many consider what the past has been about and the possibilities that the future might hold. It is a time when people make resolutions to do something or change something in […]
OUR USE OF OBJECTS – And Their Importance In Our Lives.
Several weeks ago I wrote a post on our internal world and how it is populated (https://www.drceccoli.com/2012/08/our-internal-world-and-how-it-is-populated/). I was drawing attention to the powerhouse that runs our life. In that post I focused on the significant players in our lives and our relationships to them. Today, I would like to speak about the rest of […]
WAIT WAIT DON’T TELL ME – On NOT Helping and the dance of mutuality.
It may seem curious for a psychoanalyst to write a post about not helping but that is exactly what I am going to do here. Three weeks ago I wrote about how difficult it is to sit and wait from the patients’ point of view (click here to read: https://www.drceccoli.com/2012/09/what-do-i-do-action-thought-and-change/).This week I turn to the […]
OUR INTERNAL WORLD – And how it is populated.
Most of us are used to thinking about our life and how it progresses from the outside. We look at what we have accomplished and done, our family, our friends, our work, our daily routines and interactions. We tend to think about our lives as made up of the events that happen to us […]
THE LONG AND THE SHORT OF IT: Is therapy forever?
I had planned on writing a post on collaboration, something that has been on my mind quite a lot lately. Then, Sunday morning I woke to a New York Times article that got my blood boiling – In Therapy Forever? Enough Already (click link to view): http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/22/opinion/sunday/in-therapy-forever-enough-already.html?_r=1&ref=todayspaper There are many reasons why it stirred me […]
THE BONDS THAT HOLD US: ON BLOOD AND LOVE.
This blog is collaboration. While I am writing it, it is based on something that was shared with me regarding a meaningful personal experience in psychotherapy. It was spawned from a posting on authenticity (https://www.drceccoli.com/2011/07/on-being-authentic/) in which I described the potential curative power of relationships that rely on the sharing of felt experience. This got […]
THE NUTCRACKER – On Being A Soldier Through Life.
During the recent holiday season, on my daily commute to the office, I walked by a poster of New York City Ballet’s Nutcracker, smiling at the familiar image of rosey-cheeked wooden soldiers and the memories that it elicited of my childhood. Until one morning as I walked by, it elicited something else, the image of […]